-rep don't get me wrong, just put more effort into your story.

here is a list of things I don't like about it:

1: I don't like the "My name "WILL" be Valor Badger.  At that moment I saw you wrote "WILL BE" I tought that you aren't putting any effort to get into the character perspective, u should replace the "WILL BE " with a "IS".

2: you had 2 sisters and 1 brother wich disrespected you, but how can the dog think your untrusted?

3:  there are more problems regarding this.

I woke up I heard this tapping noise. I got up opened the door and than a zombie came trying to kill me.I screamed and smashed his head againest the wall.

so the first problem here is this part "opened the door and than a zombie came trying to kill me." How did you knew it was a zombie? and this is not creative at all... you opened the door and the zombie came? he was waiting at your door for you to wake up or what?

the second problem here, one that I really don't like at all is this sentence "I screamed and smashed his head againest the wall"  first, why would someone grab a zombie head, that would crearly get you bitten and second, do you think smashing a zombie head against the wall will really kill it? I don't think so.

4: OK so I think this is a funny one =]]

First we have this sentence from your story "I walked outside and saw raiders inside" how the heck you ran *OUTSIDE* and see raiders *INSIDE* xD

second, you say this "They left and form that day I always wanted to try to get my revenge and take down that group." first thing that should concern you in a post-apocalyptic world should be your own survival, not revenge, and even if let's say you really wanted revenge, shouldn't you need a pretty good reason for it? from what you say you wanted revenge because they took stuff from your house, dude, if every house you will find on the unturned server would've been owned by someone before then hundreds of people would want to take revenge on you because you took stuff from they're homes.

And the last things I want to say are these. 

first, at the second question wich was this "Are you somewhat fluent in speaking English?" your answer was "very well"

then let's take a look at the grammar on your story.

1: "opened the door and *THAN* a zombie"

2: "I screamed and smashed his head *AGAINEST* the wall."

3: "They left and *FORM* that day I always wanted to try to get my revenge"

also about your age, I see you're saying you're 14, but I think that your around11-12 considering the story you've made, at 14 you should be more creative at least, but again, that's just my opinion.

P.S: Don't take me the wrong way, I'm not a hater, I just told you what you have done wrong and what you should change.

Denied. Try again Next week.